Here I want to shed some light on what I actually feel, and how I deal with it. But there is one thing I want to say first, that I almost so close experienced the freedom and reality of.
You never have to worry or think excessively about food and your weight ever again
So important it’s bold.
I still find it difficult to stop obsessing about food. Everyone says that changing your relationship with food and yourself is a journey, and it is. I don’t claim to be free of the issues yet, but things are a lot better than they were. For a while I was stuck in repetitive and obsessive thoughts that still return from time to time. Still those thoughts about what I am going to eat, and when, and maybe I’m eating too much.
Underlying this is are two intense fears.
- I will not be able to eat what I like in the future
- I won’t be able to fill the void once I let food go.
So the first part. The one thing that made me stop obsessing about food now or in the future, was to realise that I was being paradoxical. By binge eating I was eating what I wanted, but my guilt prevented me from actually realising I could, and was and it was acceptable to eat at all! So the number one point is drop the shame and guilt, and eat freely. There are no moral consequences!
It is the second point I primarily want to address. Sorting out your food issues is hard. It is scary. Something that took over my life for a solid block of time is about to be removed and my subconcious mind is terrified of letting go. It doesn’t know what to fill the void with, and from here nothing seems as interesting as food-related chatter. Does this relate to any of you?
So here are some questions that I asked myself to get to the heart of the matter, and find some solutions:
Why do I not want to let go of food and live my life? What is holding me back?
Is it fear of the unknown?
Is it fear of time in my brain by myself?
Is it because I have to accept myself as I am?
In order to truly find freedom, I had to address these issues head on. That meant stepping out of my comfort zone, and actively doing what I was scared of. You all know about finding what you truly love is the key to displacing food mania. I realised that self-acceptance of where I was right at that moment meant I could leave all my past fears behind. I had to treat myself like my best friend. And above all I had to realise that it was okay to be me, and actually wasn’t all that bad to be present in my life.
So, as an end point. Just chill, and let it go. You are okay, and everything is fine. You are amazing in this life, so don’t wait for your food fears to disappear by themselves. Take action!