This week’s post is a tad early as I’m away from the internets this weekend (yippee!). I’m going to do a little dream focus today, and post a (little) away from food. In the mind of a disordered eater, dreams are related to food. How many of these do you recognise?
- If I’m thin then I can get a new job
- People will like me more if I’m thin
- If I eat x life won’t be as scary
- Controlling my food means that I’ve got a grip on things
- Argh I hate how I feel… ooh look, a cookie.
- When I eat people can’t hurt me
- I have no freedom in the rest of my life, I can eat what I f-ing want to.
You are not a cookie monster. Dreams happen regardless of how you look, feel and everything else. Life moves on whether you love your body or hate it. Why go through life wishing you were different?
I wasted so much time procrastinating, ruminating, researching food and disordered eating and even recovery, that I forgot I had a life. I felt so uneasy with myself that all I could focus on was making myself look different, when actually I didn’t want to be me.
Life lesson: accept who you are today to become who you want to be tomorrow.
Thinness won’t change you, changing your attitude will. Your goal is to be as true to the real you as possible, and sticking to it no matter what. This will be hard, but oh so worth it.